This morning at 6:57, I am mid-dream after falling back asleep sometime between 5:30 and 6:56. MOMMY! Where’s my silly putty!?!? Which is followed by repetitive toots from a recorder that plays the same note no matter which holes are covered up. So much for my self improvement plan, which involved getting more sleep....
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Today, like all days, at way-too-early After I’ve been up until way-too-late I hear the click-click-click Of Hayden turning off his night light Then comes the pat-pat-pat Of his flat little feet And he climbs into my bed with a smile But the sweet warm snuggle Quickly turns to a struggle With move your...
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I am not an animal lover (don’t tell me this surprises you). The fur?  Yuck. The slobber and the poop?  Even yuckier. Plus, kitties, and sometimes doggies, set my lungs into a state of pure anger, so I am pretty much not cut out to be around animals. Despite all this, a single runaway...
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So, BlogHer 2012. It’s right around the corner. Okay, not exactly, but early bird ticket pricing ends in a month, so this is key decision-making time.  And to go or not to go… that is the question. BlogHer 2011 was so easy for me, it would have been silly not to go.  All I...
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Yeah, I am a little late.  I think I’m entitled. I’ll bet it smells like cheap cigars. No, YOU get a time out! Mommy, I love you. What if Earf sounded like Yerf? Probably when I grow up I will have a mustache like Daddy because when boys grow up they usually have mustaches....
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I want to thank you all for the outpouring of support you have shown me this week and since I began this blog two years ago.  Yes, I write for me.  But if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound?  After abstaining from...
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Those of you who have been with me for awhile know about the loss I’ve experienced (if not, you can read about it here and here). For almost two years we have tried to have a second child.  I have been pregnant three times and had three miscarriages, the latest one just this week....
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This kid never ceases to confuse humor me.  I can’t believe he actually says this stuff.  I couldn’t make this shit up! My dad said in Nork City tomorrow a big parade is going on there. Probably when Stella* is older she will grow a baby in her tummy. I am glad I don’t...
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You!  Dorky man by the cheese! You had better not be thinking of making small talk with me. Don’t make me be snotty to you. In fact, don’t even look at me. That’s right, just walk away. Back to the bread isle. You!  In the white Mercedes! Put down the phone and step on...
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“Clara will be here in twenty minutes.  I’m going to go get ready.” Ten minutes pass. I clop/hobble out of the bedroom to go find a mirror, and Scott catches sight of me as I pass by. Are you going to wear those shoes like that? “Yeah!” (with false confidence)  “It’s totally in right...
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