Since When Is It Not Okay To Have Feelings?

October 2, 2010

I really have something I need to get off my chest (as if I don’t do that here already).

Lately, I have been getting numerous “comments” to my posts that are, well, more like messages of a personal agenda to save me.  Comments from readers that they are worried about me and will be praying for me.

Because if I write about feeling conflicted, or sad, or lonely, or frustrated, or just damned grumpy, then I must have lost my way with God.  Because, clearly, if I was right with The Lord, I would never feel conflicted, or sad, or lonely, or frustrated, or just damned grumpy.  I would never question my own parenting methods, or feel badly about myself, or be dragged down by fatigue.  Because I would have given it all to The Lord.

I don’t experience these things because I have lost my way.  I experience them because I am human.  And I address them because I am honest.  And because I want to write.  I want to write, whether it’s about a shitty day I had or about how I made the perfect soup or how my son made me laugh ’til I peed my pants.  Because all of these things are part of me.  Part of my life.

Writing helps me deal.  Helps me feel connected.

Am I sounding defensive?  I don’t want to, but I feel the need to explain myself and my voice.  If this is beginning to sound like a public response to some personal comments, well, it is.  One I wanted to share with all of you.

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6 Responses to Since When Is It Not Okay To Have Feelings?

  1. Alex@LateEnough on October 2, 2010 at 8:12 pm

    I actually think God is the best person to yell at. He never yells back. He’s not easily offended (because he has TOTALLY seen it all). And he’s already forgiven me!

    Seriously, keep on feelin’! As long as you don’t treat people crappy (or at least apologize for all the human times that we do!) You are all good. We can’t control our feelings. Just what we do with them.

    And I’ll be praying for your commenters now. Haha.

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  2. Elly Lou on October 3, 2010 at 6:01 pm

    This post is totally directed at me, isn’t it? I’m getting too pushy with my Jesus agenda, eh? Well, then, I guess I’ll just have to mix it up and talk about vaginas for a change.

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  3. pattypunker on October 4, 2010 at 8:24 pm

    amen sista! you don’t need to find your way or talk to god. unless, i am god, yeah maybe i am, how about that! and in that case please keep writing to me. i love your humanity.

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  4. Motpg on October 5, 2010 at 12:06 pm

    That’s what I like about the honesty. If you admit an imperfect world and still have faith, isn’t that the whole point? I figure God created blogging to give himself a little break ; )

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  5. Ginger on October 5, 2010 at 3:53 pm

    Hey, it’s the honesty that connects us–that proof that we all go through struggles and difficulties and good times and bad. That doesn’t need fixing, it just needs support!

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  6. kris on October 7, 2010 at 1:01 pm

    I am not a religious woman. Wanted to put that out there so that you know where I am coming from. So there.

    For me?

    As a writer, I know that there are many times when I use hundreds of words to capture a moment in time. To try to share with my audience a deep poignant something that was there and then gone. Fleeting.

    And sometimes, when my readers come to my words, they interpret my moment as a life-time. As though the moment I have described is my entire reality instead of a moment. A moment.

    A moment that passes and moves into the next.

    A life is made of all sorts of moments.

    And no one moment or hour or day captures the entirety.

    Readers need to remember (I think) that moments pass.

    Into the next.

    And while they think they know who a writer is because of the way she described this moment right here?

    There are surprises that lie ahead . . . in the moment that lies ahead.

    So there.

    [Reply]

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