In Dancing Heaven
Once a week after school I would carpool with the other girls from school. We’d change in the car, out of our Izods and knickers, and into our scratchy buff-colored tights, our Danskin leotards and Capezios. Our ballet outfits.
Although I never learned anything beyond a potty-boo-ray (I won’t pretend to know how to spell that term) and my instructor was a skinny old lady who called kids “fatso”, I loved taking ballet because I loved to dance. AND I got to wear a little pink chignon thingy, crocheted by the elderly neighbor across the street, over my hair bun for recitals.
But as I got a little older, classmates dropped out of ballet and moved onto more dangerous, intimidating sports like gymnastics or softball. And eventually, I did, too. Minus the sports. Although, I never lost my love for dancing. I dreamed of becoming a back up dancer for Michael Jackson or Madonna. Girls Just Want To Have Fun? Hells yes.
I tried to go back to it as a teenager, but it was too late. Any other seventeen year old girls who took dance classes had been doing it all their lives and were GOOD. I ended up in a beginner jazz dancing class, the only high school kid among a bunch of thirty year-old women. We learned a routine to Careless Whisper. I quit after a month.
The great thing is, I actually became a dancer after all. I am always the first one on the dance floor. I perform two-step and swing solo in my living room. I’ve been known to get down while cleaning house, only to wake up the next day unable walk down the stairs. What!? Pretending you are Britney Spears is hard work!
So when I discovered So You Think You Can Dance a couple of years ago it was like the purpose of life had been revealed to me. I was meant to sit on my sofa, watch these people dance, and cry.
This is my third year watching the show. It’s actually the only show I watch (in real time, that is- thank you, Netflix). When Scott comes home from work I am perched inches away from the screen, heart rate elevated, teary eyed, with a smile plastered on my face.
I am in dancing heaven.
And in my mind, I am dancing with them.